Tarquinn2049

If this is a normal restriction at your office, would other people who work in that environment have solutions?

I think you are downplaying the effect of current style social media. The cycle and spirals they perpetuate to people that don’t know they should be swimming against the current, rather than letting it carry them where it is going.

If that is where you are coming from, I think it might be worth giving the first message in this thread a second read. You may have brought more to it than what was written. I agree that it’s not “100%” as they stated, but it is -a- percentage and shouldn’t just go unsaid. Other than the “guaranteed” wording, the message is pretty much the same as what you are saying.

Just change all the "will"s to "might"s. And keep in mind it is written for todays youth, not our childhood, this kid has access to social media streams that can very easily reinforce bad ideas as much as they can good ideas.

I’m not saying it “does” fit. I’m writing that to her. As she gave no indication or contraindication to whether it applies. Other than asking what our experiences were and what relevant advice would have fit our experiences… these are experiences that were had, and the advice that would go with them.

Your life was different, you gave advice that fit yours, thank you for your advice. We also gave advice.

Yeah, it’s definitely not an “every male” thing. But other than that, it does contain good advice if it does end up being relevant. And if non-conservative males are tough to find in her area, odds are higher that her son could be encountering those types of influences outside the home.

I was a “relatively” weak guy growing up, videogames with no exercise or weights, I did do some physical chores and participated in most of my gym classes, lol, but I was for sure still way stronger than my mom, and she had a manual labour job. It is unfortunately very likely to be the case even if you grow up a nerd as a guy. And, in the potential case of him growing up athletic with a non-athletic mom, it can indeed be a huge difference. Not quite a shrek and fiona thing… but not as far off as we’d hope.

It can be a reasonable fear as a single mom to a teen guy growing up in a conservative area. And while it isn’t a description of every guy, if the description is sounding like it fits, then those are valid concerns and things that should be addressed and headed off before they can’t be.

My brother wasn’t very athletic either, but a little more than I was. And he wasn’t very rebellious, but a little more than I was. Only once did he ever hurt our mom physically, and it was when he was 13 and treated her the same way he would treat his friends in a heated argument, just gave her a shove… they both learned very quickly that a different approach was needed. That was with a kid who felt bad that he hurt his mom… we had friends(temporarily) that didn’t feel bad about that… those friends stopped being friends pretty quick and are mostly in jail or dead now.

We live in a small town, not super religious or conservative, but I would guess about half and half. And it was about 10% of boys that this advice applied to. In a place where conservatism or religion are further entrenched, that percentage doesn’t just go up linearly. The less sources of proper behaviour you see to counter the argument that people should behave “naturally”… even the nerds eventually succumb.

Be glad you had a childhood where this advice comes across as ridiculous.

Yeah, I don’t know if it’s from my adhd or my autism, but I do get maybe a bit manic or something between midnight and 3 am. Usually takes the form of leaving a couple pages of discord message to my brother or friends. My brother is ok with it, he has his phone silent at night anyway, friends can go either way, lol. I usually apologize once I notice I’ve done it. Hehe.

Most of my online communities are ok with it, but I, of course, tend to be drawn to other neurodiverse people socially, so that kind of makes sense.

Part of it is for sure that I can finally think clearly when everything is finally quiet. And not so bright, or smelly, or whatever else is generally around limiting my potential during the day. But it is a bit more than that, too. But yeah, then I gotta pack a full days worth of productive energy into a couple hours, then somehow convince myself to sleep while I am finally at peak wakefulness. Otherwise, my sleep schedule will keep slipping and I’ll be even harder to hang out with, hehe.

Well, just think how many of Russias bombs have been destroyed by Ukrainian buildings, Ukraine is financially ruining them…